I blame myself for whatever is happening.
For what we have made of the planet earth, for the cries that are both heard
and not heard, for the tears that dry without an answer, for the ones who are
hurt and the ones who fall. I blame myself for the natural disasters and the
ones we humans gift ourselves. Through blaming myself I hope to do well, for
myself and others; to be serious in a way that things don’t get serious and bad
in future; to understand the responsibility of being a human-the most
intelligent species so far.
I and my friend were talking about the
natural calamity that hit Uttarakhand (North India); we ended in a spat. Not
because she said that she was fed up with the zero reactions that came from the
elite members of our society (though she is absolutely right to feel so) but because she ended with a dull expression- ‘Leave
it.’ I pounded at her last comment and said that the ‘Leave it’ attitude was
the reason behind all that was happening in the world.
Elite class is in minority and we how say ‘Leave
it’ are in majority. Individuals matter whether or not they hold a
position in the society.
I believe that every single action (even of
thinking) is responsible for something in the universe. Every little step of
ours can change the look of what the universe will be in future. Yes, that big
is the role we play, that is why it becomes our duty to develop our intellect
so as to understand this role. It doesn't mean to be whatever one feels when
the term duty is discussed but it means a joy ride. Joyous only if you can feel
the universe, if you know the vastness of the universe and the tininess of yours
in it; if you can recognise your essence in it. For this you don’t need the
material richness, leave also the spiritual richness aside for some time, all
you need is ‘you.’
Do you know yourself? Why don’t you talk to
yourself? Why the hesitation? Talking to oneself is disturbing because then
many things stand against you and your personality; things that compel you to
change yourself and we all know that self-mastery is the most difficult to
achieve. Will not the world change if every one of us is a little better
than we are now?
I call this process of knowing myself
joyous simply because I’ll then know myself truly.
And in blaming myself I am not creating a
burden but rather I am giving myself an opportunity to do something more than
complaining, no matter how small that action is. It counts!